These people epitomise all that is bad about computer-care.

• They read a book once, it had ‘Technical’ in the title.
• They read a website once, it had ‘Tweaks’ in the title.
• They fix their mom’s computer, installing realms of free anti-spyware software when doing so.
• They enable the windows firewall on a trusted lan, and install another firewall for good measure.
• They use the words ‘Anti-Virus’, ‘Anti-Spyware’ and ‘Firewall’ interchangeably.
• They say things like ‘fix it in the bios’.
• Their favourite piece of software is called ‘Super Extra Registry Clean Optimizer’ (order of adjectives varies).
• They know all about ‘l-eye-nux’: It’s fast, efficient, wonderful.  Some day they know they’ll try it too.
• And they honestly believe, despite all evidence to the contrary, that defragmenting a computer hard disk fixes issues.

So, if you ever have a computer problem, and someone gives you some advice containing the word ‘defragment’, consider running away, very fast.  God has a special level of hell reserved for these people, and you don’t want to be near them when he sends them there.

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